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Good dawning to thee, friend,

I’m a modest lady, who likes nothing more than golf with the right man (or men – love is such a beautiful rose that no man shalt supress the branches that doth sprawl).

The first thing people usually notice about me is my noble personality, closly followed by my smashing eyebrows. I hope you will find my eyebrows to be as special as new born kittens, and my eyebrows as awesome as the first moon landing.

I work as a psychiatrist, helping children. This allows me to exercise my skills: resourcefulness and arresting bad guys. My idol is Steve Merchant. When I’m struggling with my job, I think of Steve Merchant and feel inspired to continue. I once saw Steve Merchant at a petrol station, so I feel we have a deep connection – almost spiritual, like the mist on an autumn day, or similar.

If you’re the right man for me, you’ll be bold and helpful. You won’t be afraid to be themselves and will have a healthy respect for danger.

My ideal date would involve knitting in London with a tall man by my side. While we’re there, I write poetry about your squat fingers under the light of the moon.

The right woman’s smile will light up my day like somebody igniting a sparkler on a particularly stormy November 5th. Your squat fingers will make me tremble like sitting on a park bench when a double decker bus rattles by.

When you play The Game Of Love, you win or you die.

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Date: May 17, 2020

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